Needing something to pass the time...

So Its been months since I've posted anything on here... I just need something to pass the time til I hear back from Josh so I can know that everything is okay. I know I worry too much, but considering where he is and the job he does, anything could happen.

So I went to Cynthia's Jewelery Party today and there was some really cute stuff and I bought three pieces for $53. Considering they use the Swarovski Crystals on all three of them, thats a pretty good deal. I've been thinking about Talking to Summer and possibly hosting a party, but I don't know when I'm gonna have money to be able to buy stuff again.

So I guess I'll write about the other stuff going on in my life. New happenings and things that are changing...

I broke things off with Rob. Rob wasn't a bad guy, he was great to me and great to Tallan. But he didn't want to put a title on our relationship and after four months I felt that it was time to put a title on things and he didn't feel that same. He said the cause of that was "personal reasons" that had nothing to do with me. We also didn't see eye to eye on quite a few things. He had a tendency to blow up about things that weren't a big deal to me. So I made the final decision to end things with him and move on.

Around the same time I started talking to my friend Josh, a lot. Pretty much all day, everyday when he wasn't working, we would talk on Yahoo Messenger. Josh was going through a rough time and I was able to be there for him. Well the more we talked the more we started to fall for eachother. I didn't leave Rob to be with Josh, but things just kind of ended up that way.

I started my third term of college last month. I'm trying desperately to stay afloat but its hard when the only time I have to focus on homework is when Tallan is sleeping. And even then its hard because I have stuff around the house to do and also try to get a nap in myself. There just aren't enough hours in the day. It seems all I do anymore is go go go. I don't know how DHS expects me to get a Full Time job with all these appointments, school, and life in general swirling around me. But if I don't, I lose my TANF benefits.

I turned in the paperwork for child support, so that Paul will start getting garnished straight out of his paychecks. What he thinks though, is that its going to be LESS than what he is being garnished for his unemployment. He is oh-so-wrong. According to the calculations, I will be getting $385 a month to start off, until he is caught up on his 4 months of back child support. I told him the other day that it was going to be around $300 a month and he got mad and stormed out. It was bullshit. He brags about how much he loves his son and yada yada but yet he doesn't want to help take care of him financially. I don't even have a job and I am able to take care of Tallan. I make sure he has what he needs and has toys and stuff. Paul assumes that myself and everyone else will take care of his son so he doesn't have to worry about it.

On the bright side, I'm planning a trip to Georgia in June to go visit Josh when he comes back from Iraq. I am very excited to go and see Josh and have him meet Tallan and see if he and I are a good fit. So far things are going great, I just hope it stays that way.

-Ash